This is something Audrey sent me in e-mail recently, and I thought it was pretty funny.

18 Things I Learned from Indiana Jones

  • If you throw a whip over any type of overhang, it will stick on the first shot and hold your body weight.
  • Nazis are bad.
  • Germans are really up on their biblical history.
  • Egyptians are surprisingly good sidekicks… and a lot more helpful than little Asian kids.
  • Always have a monkey around to eat the fruit before you do.
  • Revolvers always beat swords.
  • Airplane propellers beat revolvers.
  • A solid gold statue weighs as much as two handfuls of sand.
  • If you are at a party and someone says “Hey, let’s open up the Ark of the Covenant,” get the hell out of there.
  • Never leave your hat behind. Ever.
  • Never look down.
  • Monkey brains and Jell-O are nearly interchangeable.
  • Spiders are okay. Rats? No problem. But snakes…
  • X really does mark the spot.
  • There’s always another way out.
  • Jesus had lousy taste in drinkware.
  • Metal Medallion + Open Flame = Cool Looking Hand Scar.
  • Geritol and ibuprofen are miracle drugs.

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